Guidance:

• Try to understand that this is a difficult situation for your friend/family member
• Self confidence and self esteem are likely to be low
• Your friend/family member may find the things that have happened to them very embarrassing to talk about
• Your friend/family member may not have had control of finances, tenancy/mortgage or income. Life may be scary
• Your friend/family member may be worried about any repercussions should they decide to leave
• Ultimately, your friend/family member may still love their partner
• Make sure they know you are there for them
• Listen and try to be non-judgemental
• Support the friend/family member in finding where they can go for help
• Offer to go with the friend/family member to support services, such as: Safespots, the doctor, solicitor or the police
• Avoid telling the friend/family member what to do
• Spend time with the friend/family member without their partner as often as you can
• Without making it obvious, try to arrange social occasions that involve the friend/family member without their partner

Things to be mindful of:

• The abuser may try to undermine you and isolate your friend/family member from any support network.
• The abuser may try to turn your friend/family member against you by telling them lies about you
• The abuser may be rude to you if you visit
• The abuser won’t appreciate you getting involved so be careful about what you do and when you do it.
• Never approach or challenge the abuser- this could put someone in more danger
• Always prioritise safety- yours and theirs